so...

i finally got a new job.

i will be working in the video productions department of the church in "small jobs."

i'll be helping to make stuff like this with everyone there:

i am soooooooo excitedddddddagkjhdsajkghasjkghkjasdga.

it certainly has been quite some time.

a lot of things have happened lately.

i am feeling quite stressed out, to say the least. good thing blogs always listen.

the item preoccupying my mind most at the moment is a business opportunity that i will soon have (hopefully), involving the production of a series of 10-12 videos for a company in ogden. the sum of money at hand is large, and as such, i feel a great amount of pressure to deliver quality work. the problem is this: my company consists of me, myself, and i.

the project is estimated to take 425 hours in total, all of which will take place during a 14 hour-a-week semester of school, preparation for a wedding, the wedding itself, moving into a new apartment (bringing all new monthly bills), combining all monetary sources into one bank account, and continuing to work around 43 hours a week.

simply put, i feel like i have a lot on my plate.

i suppose i am most nervous about my capacity and ability to deliver quality work for this business deal. i know that i am capable, but viewing the whole project as one large item can make it appear quite daunting. i think that i just need to think of it as a step by step process... first filming, then editing, then music, etc., etc.... until it is done.

all of this pressure can get to me at times, and i feel bad, because i tend to isolate myself and stay very quiet during such moments. i suppose that i don't really see a need to tell anyone else about it a lot of the time, because they can't really do much to help. why bother to worry them, you know?

but enough about my anxiety.

katie and i have found a place to live, which is relieving. it's on 3rd Ave. and K St., which is a very nice location (close to school and work).

we paid our deposit today, and i plan on moving in this saturday.

here's a video walkthrough:

i feel like i just need to work my way through these next few months day by day, or hour by hour, if i really need to.

everything will be fine, i just need to convince myself of that.

why does sin carry the ability to separate us from God?

what about sin necessitates forgiveness?

why do the consequences of sin make a savior necessary?

explain how sin creates a spiritual debt that must be paid in order to re-establish harmony with God (in terms of accountability).

what about non-christian views of repentance? IE - islam

how do they achieve forgiveness without a savior?

what about the debt that is created as one sins?

how does the notion of God's perfection play into all of this?

any thoughts?

so there's this trend that i have noticed as of late.

everyone seems to get married after dating for seriously like, a month.

i just do not understand it.

So, there I was, sitting at work, reading about the book of Moses and Joseph Smith's subsequent translation of the Bible. Then, I had somewhat of an epiphany.

I was reading about how God was showing Moses all of his creations, and then Moses was like, "I wonder why and how he made all of this..." So he said "Tell me, I pray thee, why these things are so, and by what thou madest them?" (Moses 1:30)

So God looked at Moses face to face and said: "For mine own purpose have I made these things. Here is wisdom and it remaineth in me. And by the word of my power, have I created them, which is mine Only Begotten Son, who is full of grace and truth." (Moses 1:31-32)

Basically, God was like, "I made them with Jesus, but you don't need to know what my reasons were."

And he continued and said, "And worlds without number have I created; and I also created them for mine own purpose; and by the Son I created them, which is mine Only Begotten. And the first man of all men have I called Adam, which is many. But only an account of this earth, and the inhabitants thereof, give I unto you. For behold, there are many worlds that have passed away by the word of my power. And there are many that now stand, and innumerable are they unto man; but all things are numbered unto me, for they are mine and I know them." (Moses 1:33-35)

So God finished talking by basically saying "I've made tons of other worlds too. In fact, there have been so many that man can't count them all, but I can, because I made them and know them each. A lot of them have come and gone, but I've only told you about this world right here."

Moses was probably like, "Alright, but why did you make them?" But instead of saying that, he said this: "Be merciful unto thy servant, O God, and tell me concerning this earth, and the inhabitants thereof, and also the heavens, and then thy servant will be content." (Moses 1:36)

So, he pretty much said, "Please tell me about this earth, and all of its people... It'll make me really happy!"

Then, God was like "Ohhhh, fine." So he said: "The heavens, they are many, and they cannot be numbered unto man; but they are numbered unto me, for they are mine. And as one earth shall pass away, and the heavens thereof even so shall another come; and there is no end to my works, neither to my words. For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:37-39)

God explained that as worlds come and go in "one eternal round" (1 Nephi 10:19) that he does it all for one reason: to give man (all of his children) immortality and eternal life.

The whole plan,
his whole scheme,
EVERYTHING
is about giving us a chance to be happy with him for forever.

That strikes me as something pretty awe-inspiring.

Anyways, I thought that was neat.

In other news, I finished a book today. It was "How Wide the Divide: A Mormon and an Evangelical in conversation" by Craig Blomberg and Stephen Robinson.

I really enjoyed reading it. I just love reading about religion (Mormonism, in particular).

I have been reflecting a lot lately about how the gospel makes me feel. I was at the Draper Temple Open House as an usher about a week ago, and as I was standing there doing usherly things, I was overwhelmed with happiness.

Just knowing what I know (as is witnessed to me by the Spirit), and doing my best to show my gratitude through obedience truly fulfills the promise given by King Benjamin when he said "And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it." (Mosiah 2:41)

I miss being a missionary. It was so rewarding...You just always feel good.

But that's ok. Life will go on, and the trick is to try and enjoy it, right?

sometimes i would like to be a missionary again.

and by sometimes i mean oftentimes.

so one time i never updated this.

wanna see how clean my room is? here, take a look:


well, i guess i'm just happy about my desk.

things are the same as always. i don't really even have anything to talk about.

school is alright i guess. my production class is proving to be a ton of work.

my phone is being lame right now.

ok it's fine now.

yeah...that's pretty much it.